she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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