Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
We need to rekindle our bromance
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
