I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
