I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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