I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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