Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
