There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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