There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize