Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
3 2 1 whiskey
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
