just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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