just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
That was an excessively violent trivia night
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Randomize
