So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Buhtt sex?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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