Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Its about making memories worth repressing
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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