Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize