When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Help me help you realize you are a moron
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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