He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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