hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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