I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
