It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Don't make out with my wife yet
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize