There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
