i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
