Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Even my vagina gasped.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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