she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
