very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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