just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
