if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I'm determined to sit on that face.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize