hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
