I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
