I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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