I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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