I have demons in me.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Are my feet made of real feet?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
