And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
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