weddingsv make me drug and hornr
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
