this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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