The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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