I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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