Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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