You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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