So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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