yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
