Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize