Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Randomize
