I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
