It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
