operation have a gay friend backfired
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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