community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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