we're blogging at a bar
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
