I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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