I can't breathe out the right side of my face
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Randomize
