sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize
