there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
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